I LOVE My Womb (Photo Challenge): Day 1 – Favourite African Goddess

Today’s photo challenge was to post a photo of my favorite African Goddess. Yemaya is the African Orisha Goddess (ruler of the ocean, deep seas, and lakes), that I connect with the most. I don’t know everything about her, AND every time the opportunity for learning more about African Orishas come up, I’m always drawn to Yemaya’s energy.

I believe I connect with Yemaya, off top, because of her association with water. It took a long time for me to get used to water. I mean, I like to drink it and bathe in it, but large masses of water sort of freak me out. That feeling is because, I am not the best swimmer.

I have the worst childhood memories of me vs large bodies of water. For instance, this one time when I was on a field trip (age 5 or 6) at the local YMCA, and instead of the swim instructor LOVINGLY coaching me through my fears of being in the swimming pool (no floaties at all), this fool drops me in the deep part of the pool. You know that saying, “sink or swim”? Well, I sunk. I didn’t put up a fight to even try to swim. I literally gave in to the water.

Another time, (around the age of 7 to 9), I was at the beach with a family friend. The day was beautiful, partly sunny, and full of all the sandcastles I could make, because, I WAS NOT GOING NEAR THE OCEAN. Playing along the shore, I also watched how other kids, and just people in general, were fearlessly enjoying the ocean, I mean all the way up to their waists. And to me, that was unheard of, because once again, I WAS NOT GOING NEAR THE OCEAN.

Bravery, started to settle in, because I wanted to experience the same joy THOSE people were feeling in the ocean. I put my  little blue pail aside, and began to walk towards the shoreline. Water hitting right at my toes, I went in a little further. Water hitting right at my ankles, I went in a little bit more. Water hitting right at my knees, and I’m starting to feel myself a lil’ bit… so much, that I turned my back to the ocean and stepped in further, and now the water is hitting right at the middle of my thighs.

I turned around to look at everyone playing in the ocean, who is now behind me, and fear automatically sets in. The biggest wave I’ve ever seen is rising high, and it looks like it’s about to swallow me. I try to run, but as the tide is moving me back and forth, my feet loses it’s grip because guess what? I’m standing on a sand bar!

So when I come back to consciousness on the shore, all I can remember is a big ass wave swallowing me, taking me deep into the ocean, and throwing me back on the shore. Talk about NEVER EVER wanting to get near an ocean again, that was me!

So now, being grown and conquering some fears associated with water, I’m not so afraid.

I said all of that to say, my experiences with water has played a major role in my life, by cleansing (physical and spiritual) and, ritual healing and offering. The representation of Yemaya and water, could have been a mini rites of passage for my role as the person I am today, a mother, a nurturer, empathic, a healer, etc…

For me, I connect with Yemaya because of her associations with the number 7, spirituality, moonstone, clear quartz, turquoise, sandalwood, and cowrie shells (all of my favorite things). And although, I may have had a traumatic experience with what Yemaya is the ruler of, being in tune with her energy gives me comfort, healing, and understanding to the wombman I am, and becoming.

She is water, she is magic, she is healing, she is Mama Watta!

My intention for the remainder of the #ILOVEMYWOMB photo challenge is to bring Yemaya into my morning meditations.

To get in on this awe-inspiring and fun journey of womb healing and awareness, follow along and participate each day for the next 30 days, of the #ILOVEMYWOMBPHOTOCHALLENGE (@ILOVEMYWOMB).

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May Cause Miracles: Week 3 (Review)

Week 3 – Day 15 

I was debating in my mind if I really wanted to talk about my body image issues on such a wide platform. Hearing other people share their experiences with me, and me, identifying with their body image issues, pushed me into releasing, not only for myself, but for others who are GROWING through the same shit.

What’s that shit?

Ego, those false perceptions, and those self-punishing attacks that we put ourselves through. Every time I catch myself, thinking and speaking to myself in such a negative a way, I’m always like, “would I allow anybody to talk so negatively toward me?” The answer is “HELL NO”. So why the hell am I doing it to myself. Now, for the past 4 to 5 years, I’ve developed an awareness of how I view myself, what I’m saying to myself about my body, and to be honest, struggling to find balance over what I choose vs what I want to put into my body. This week is the week I’m supposed to pay close attention to the foods I choose to eat and the emotions surrounding my cravings. Let’s see what happens.

Oh, and let me just say this. I’m giving up the fear and false perception of my this pregnancy weight I’ve allowed to stay with me for over 10 years. Pregnancy weight gain is a challenge to get rid of, especially when there is depression involved. That’s a whole other story, that I can get into at a later time. Just know that my body image issues stem from post-pregnancies, and listening to the negative views of others that weren’t compassionate enough to handle me with LOVE. AND, at the time, I wasn’t strong enough to handle myself with LOVE.

Week 3 – Day 16

 

I wake up every morning and go for a jog in the neighborhood. Today was the day, I literally gave zero f***s about running or walking anywhere. Although, I still got up and did my four miles, I was tired (mentally). I feel like because I’m opening myself to doing the work on releasing these false perceptions I have surrounding my body, the life lessons are being magnified. When I quote, “Show me what you’ve got…”, as quickly as I’m putting it out there, is as quickly as those lessons are coming in! Paying attention to what I choose to eat hasn’t been difficult at all, it’s the act of binge eating that’s my problem. I’m okay with the fact that I’m a conscious eater (raw vegan, vegan, & vegetarian), knowing when to stop is another thing. I’m over eating on vegetarian dishes, thinking that just because it’s healthy, it’s fine. I was an over eater when I was eating a diet full of dairy and meat.  I’m again realizing, the over eating is directly related to emotional triggers, hence the term ’emotional eater”, and me, stuffing down or suppressing feelings. Let’s see what else comes up for me this week….

Week 3 – Day 17

 

These cravings tho’! I swear, I feel like with every thought to change my life around this eating lifestyle, the life tests are becoming more challenging! Today, I wanted to eat every thing within the scope of what I could eat. I had 3 smoothies, a whole bag of organic popcorn, a double corn fritter burger, and was wondering why I was feeling extra full. 

Ok, so something unique about me, I hate to feel full. That tightness in the belly after you’ve had way too much to eat, I hate that feeling. My intention after every meal, is to feel satisfied, not stuffed and hardly able to move afterwards. 

Feeling stuffed, was how I was feeling after gorging on all the food today. I had to stop and journal about my emotions at the end of the day. Check out this morning’s passage, done in the mirror, “I call on my inner guide to help  me see with new eyes. In this mirror I see truth reflected back to me. I no longer hold a vision of my ego’s fearful projections; I choose to see light instead. I see a beautiful ball of golden light above my head. This light pours over my body. The image of my body is covered in light.”

I chose to ignore today’s message, allowing my fear of change to send me on a spiraling day of emotional eating. My emotional eating has everything to do with fear, fear of change, and fear of living  in my truth. Hmm, that last one really hit home for me. It was in all the ugly relationships, where I developed fear of not living in my truth. 

I am free today, because I am not my body!

 

Week 3 – Day 18


I woke up to feeling great in my body! Today is a new day, a fresh start! Yesterday stuff, is just what that is, in the past!

 

Week 3 – Day 19

The F word. Forgiveness.

Still resonating on the past couple of days. 

 

 

Week 3 – Day 20

Quick little story to share.

During my morning jog, a neighbor drove by and said, “Can you run an extra lap for me?”. Without any hesitation, I said, “Sure!”. The neighbor was surprised at my answer and then said, “I’ll be expecting to see the results later this evening!” We both laughed. But as my neighbor’s car began to fade away in the distance, I began to speak into his realm.

“Divine LOVE, divine healing, and restraint to everything not in alignment with the course of his day.”

Amazingly, I had  a powerful day full of everything I seeded into my neighbor’s realm. What he subconsciously asked for was something we both needed. 

Week 3 – Day 21

*I had to re-write this more than 2x because of Mercury Retrograde!!! I’ve lost tons of powerful words through re-writing this over and over, and have learned my lesson about procrastinating and saving my work!!

Week 4 is coming soon! 

Light & LOVE!

© Copyright 2015 – Goddess Mena Love. All Rights Reserved

Review: Step Into Your Biggest Life Possible: An Inspiring Master Class w/Dan Nevins

Step Into Your Biggest Life Possible: An Inspiring Master Class w/Dan Nevins

Step Into Your Biggest Life Possible: An Inspiring Master Class w/Dan Nevins

 

Dan Nevins, works with the Wounded Warrior Project and is an Iraq veteran who lost both of his legs after a combat injury. His inspiring life story of how he overcame physical and emotional trauma through his yoga practice was shared today, along with inquiry, meditation, and a powerful hour long asana practice at BIG Power Yoga (Montrose).

If you missed this workshop, soooooooo sorry for you! I was truly inspired to “take my legs off” and get down to exactly what I needed to remove and step fully into my biggest life possible.

 

I didn’t really know what to expect from taking Dan’s workshop and I’m glad that I didn’t put too much energy into expecting “something”. Allowing myself to be in the present moment, flowing and dealing with everything that came up for me, confirmed once again, my purpose. I say “once again” because lately, the majority of my conversations, how I move in my daily life, and what I’m allowing myself to see with the blinders off, shows me confirmation of my purposeful life’s work.

My intention upon taking this class was to expose my oldest son to seeing the possibility of what he can create if he allowed himself to get out of his on way, and to see and hear firsthand Dan’s story as triumph, powerful, distress at times, humility, and empower sense of humor in his life. This message was essential for the both of us, and of course, right on time.

Dré (my oldest son) has cerebral palsy. In the past week, as I engaged with others at BIG, speaking powerfully about Dan’s personal triumph, immediately I knew that my son would benefit greatly, as well as  for me, the chance to see the spark of what he would get from this class. Through the inquiry segment of the workshop, I was able to bring to light my fear on what hold’s me back from stepping into my biggest life possible. I was impressed that my son was open enough to see and know exactly what it is, that’s keeping him from stepping into his biggest life possible. I believe in doing self-work, and seeing Dré really think about what’s holding him back, and being authentic enough to speak up about it, made me so proud of him.

After the inquiry, the asana practiced began. Without judgement about Dré  practicing yoga in a heated room for the first time, created a LOVING and mutual bond between the both of us…….so much, that in times when I could feel that he may have needed assistance, I came out of my pose to powerfully and LOVINGLY guide him into the pose that worked for him. A little off subject, that inspired me so much, that I’m soooooooooo sure that I want to  totally take Baron Baptiste’s  Art of Assisting workshop sometime next year. I was filled with so much joy and a recharge of LOVE by assisting my son, and allowing him to mirror me, as well.

Funny thing about my yoga practice at BIG is whenever it’s at the part where we are going into bridge, which leads into wheel, I stay in bridge……out of FEAR. I’ve practiced wheel many times before and to me, being in wheel exposes my weakness, especially in a room full of yogi’s who are sooooooo not worried about that. Whenever, I get ready to go into wheel, there’s a lot of resistance.

Today was different.

While transitioning into wheel from bridge, Dan Nevins spoke about being a breakthrough for someone who can’t do it. That touched me to the core so much, and in that moment, the breakthrough I had by releasing my fears and fully going into wheel powerfully and stronger than I’ve ever been in my whole life, was the breakthrough my son received as he looked at me when I came down from wheel. I did wheel, not just for me, for him, too! Being in that triumphant energy made me look inward at my own yoga practice and yoga teaching as a whole. Being of service to others in my own yoga practice and while teaching, was another confirmed purpose of my life’s work.

AH-MAZING!!!

Dré and I was able to connect with Dan Nevins during the intermission and after class, and he was very humble, funny, gracious, and light-filled! I appreciate the inspiring life impact he had on Dré, and my vigor and growth in those three hours.

Blessings to Dan Nevins for sharing your personal story, and light and LOVE to all!

 

© Copyright 2015 – Goddess Mena Love. All Rights Reserved

 

 

 

May Cause Miracles – Week 1

I’m so glad that I chose to be consistent in my journaling. There were things that I discovered about myself, that I knew I would’ve forgotten had I not written them down. Journaling is so good for you. All thoughts that pass through your mind can be written down, and when the time comes, you’re able to go back and read what you were thinking, reflecting on what has changed in your life, for the better and to learn from. Journaling is a real awesome experience.

Now This is my second time starting the MayCause Miracles 40 day self empowerment journey. The first time I  attempted and only made it to week 2. And when I think about how I started and why I started, I may have thought I was ready, however I wasn’t. I also realized that last  time when I started, my relationship with my boyfriend was the main focus. This time around, the main focus has totally been about me, about my self development, how I respond instead of reacting, what to do when I react instead of responding, seeing LOVE in everything that I do, and being a vessel for LOVE to radiate to others.

Week one of MAY CAUSE MIRACLES has been very eye-opening and full of acknowledged self-growth. And let me just say this, MAY CAUSE MIRACLES, is not just for women. This is a book for anyone ready to experience something greater within themselves, a shift in perception to be in alignment to expect and receive miracles all the time.

Week one began on a Tuesday for me, random huh? Yeah, starting challenges and certain projects on Monday isn’t my thing. I feel like I get more out of whatever I’m doing by starting on Tuesday. Which reminds me, that I need to research why Tuesdays are my favorite day to work, astrologically.

Week one was all about becoming miracle minded!

Day 1 : Witness Your Fear

“I am willing to witness my fear.”

Consciously, I put myself in a position to recognize when any type of fear arises, to remind my self that “I am willing to see my fear”. Fear comes in all types of ways. For the most part, this was an easy day for me. Since the last time I attempted to start MAY CAUSE MIRACLES, I began to live my life in a way, that I would be conscious of witnessing my fear, even if it came from a deeply rooted issue. This time around, the main focus coming up for me has been mindful eating. Being conscious of what I put in my mouth, and not gorging or binging! I was able to get to the root of why at times I over eat. It’s hard to swallow the pill that you have an eating disorder. I almost wasn’t ready to face that I am an emotional eater. As a result I started a food journal to be more accountable and watch what I am feeding my body.

Keeping a food journal went great all day, until my boyfriend called me, asking if I went to Popeye’s. All day, the urge to eat anything outside of vegetarian was not there. I’m not a habitual Popeye’s chicken eater, he is, and actually every Tuesday because of the 0.99 special. The weird thing is that as soon as I got off the phone with him, all these unnatural cravings for Popeyes grew stronger and stronger, prompting me to get in my car, drive to Popeye’s, order, breathe in the food while driving back home , and inhaling that chicken in front of the tv.

While I was eating this gross ass chicken,  I was scolding myself in my mind the whole entire time. I felt so bad, eating it, and I felt even worse afterwards. I felt like all that hard work of mindful eating that I had done all day, landed me to this. That was a hell of a trigger! I began to dig deeper, dissecting the emotional attachments that I associated with emotional eating. Key words or phrases, I came up with were anxiety, adrenaline rush, and fear.

Day 2: Become Willing

“I am willing to see this differently. I am willing to see LOVE.”

I woke up with mindful eating on my mind, especially since my stomach felt like shit and heavy as hell from the night before. I wanted to be mad at myself, but reminding myself to be present gave me the will to move and start new. Day two’s experience was me focusing more on my spiritual growth. My yoga practices have become so much more meaningful. I know for some, yoga is all about the physicality. For me, yoga is so spiritual. Being able to connect to the Divine through myself, creating a space for silence, focus, and intention, is so powerful to me! I realized that I practice yoga for the spiritual experience only, and as a result, my physical appearance begins to reflect a positive, healthy, melinated, glow! The more I focused on my spiritual connection, and the time I have to give attention to it, and mindful eating, fears that became visible on Day 2 had me literally stopping before taking action, and seeing the fear with LOVE. I did good on Day 2.

Day 3: Choose A New Perspective

“LOVE did not create this.”

Day 3 opened up with great, passionate, sex! The connection was so deep. I won’t get to deep into the act, however, allowing myself to shift my perception from fear to LOVE when it comes to relationships is allowing me to let go of my rocky past. Committed relationships don’t last too long for me, not because I’m not ready, but because of the men I chose, who weren’t ready. Every day I share my space with my boyfriend, I am reminded that he is really here, and he is really here to learn and grow even when I don’t think he is at times.

Switching gears, in yoga class I chose to try wheel pose. For those who don’t know what wheel pose is, please  google wheel pose or look up #40DaysMenaLove. My youngest son, Xavier gave me so much inspiration to do wheel pose, after seeing him do push ups in wheel pose! Now, of course, my body isn’t ready to do push ups in wheel pose, and with removing fear, I was able to attempt and lift myself off the ground a little bit!

Yay!

Progress!!

While trying wheel pose over and over, I kept saying to myself, “LOVE did not create this”.  I chose to remain powerful and LOVE myself even more when I felt I couldn’t do it. Not to mention, the chakra power crystals I made for myself, especially for the root chakra, had me on some serious grounding, knowing that I am safe and secure, and an abundance of strength.

Day 4: Gratitude is the Attitude

“Gratitude is my only attitude today.”

Once again, I had a pretty easy day, and grateful for that! Due to the weather, I was unable to go to Big Yoga (in Houston, TX) to practice with all my fellow yogis and yoginis. However, I was able to practice at home. I am so grateful that I didn’t quit in the middle of practicing! I am so grateful that my at-home practice was a success and a reminder that I CAN do yoga at home! Even though, I was inconvenienced a little by the weather, I am grateful that I was able to center myself in my at-home yoga practice. Doing yoga by myself, without other people, made me feel another type of connection with the Divine that I don’t normally get to feel when I’m with others. I felt like with every position I was talking directly to God, like it was just me and the Divine having a conversation alone! It felt great! I am so grateful I have the time to do yoga anytime I want! And I’m especially grateful for that day to come when I become a certified yoga teacher, it’s coming in the near future!

Day 5: The F Word — Learning to Forgive.

“I forgive myself for choosing fear. I choose LOVE instead.”

Mindful eating was on point! No all of a sudden “a-ha” moments today. Day 5 was more of me just coasting and being conscious of LOVING thoughts. Any fears that came up for me, I was able to assess and forgive myself for believing in the negative thought pattern I created for myself. I’m learning, I’m growing!  The one thing I did learn from Day 5, and also through a group gathering at Big Yoga was “the key to getting present is knowing when you’re not”. I choose LOVE instead.

Day 6: Expect Miracles!

“I believe in miracles!”

I do! I really really do! And I’m grateful that even in the midst of obstacles, I can still say I believe in miracles! It’s a wonderful feeling to shift your perception from fear to LOVE! It allows you to seriously noticing the small miracles too, that lead to the really big miracles!! Day 6 was full of treats! I attended a guided meditation workshop hosted by Nancy Sheridan Perry, co-founder of Big Yoga.  The miracle in all of this, is that I’m not scared to meditate alone anymore! In the beginning of my enlightened spiritual journey, I could totally help you meditate, but I couldn’t meditate alone. Now, I can meditate alone, and that’s a miracle. And it’s an even bigger miracle that I’m able to  implement meditation as a daily practice. The more you practice meditating, the more you are strengthening your “letting go” muscle.

Day7: Reflect & Prepare

I was tested today.

I was tested today and I feel like I failed.

On my FB page, my relationship status stated that I was in an open relationship. I have my own meaning of what a open relationship means to me. My definition of an open relationship is having a relationship with multiple people, but not in the sense that the relationships all have to be intimate. When you think about it, you have relationships with many people. I have a relationship with my mother, my boyfriend, my children, my yogi friends, my best friends, and GOD. Why are we limiting the status of being in a open relationship to a woman or a man having multiple partners? See, I’m an out-the-box thinker!

My boyfriend is so not the internet computer type, however certain family members and friends of his are, and have brought it to his attention that the status of being in an open relationship is inappropriate.

Do I hide anything?

No.

Has my relationship status been “open” since I entered into a committed, intimate, and exclusive relationship with him?

Yes.

Why is he bothered by my relationship status?

I have no idea.

Could it be his insecurities?

Possibly.

To make a long story short, we get into this heated debate about changing my relationship status. I didn’t have a problem with him suggesting I change it, however I had an issue with him not understanding why I chose to keep my relationship status open. After all was said, I had to go deep within and apologize to him. I apologized for yelling at him to get my point across, thinking that yelling louder will help him understand. However, I did stress that I was not apologizing for what I said.

Agreeing to disagree, I chose to compromise and change my relationship status to “domestic partnership”. Seeing how my “open relationship” status made him feel regardless of how it meant to me, made me kinda see it from his perspective. I used all of week one’s tools to get me to make that choice. By me changing my status, made him share a little more of his feelings for me, and also made him feel like he is in this relationship, too. We’re a lot more happier today, and of, course our LOVEmaking is on point!

*(Chakra Jewelry by Mena Love on Instagram @Lovestoned_Gems)

© Copyright 2014 – Goddess Mena Love. All Rights Reserved

Review: Gabrielle Bernstein – How to Release Fear

This video is right on time for me! I am on “day 2” of 40 Days May Cause Miracles by Gabrielle Bernstein.

Today’s affirmation from the book, is “I am willing to see things differently. I am willing to see LOVE.

I belong to a very awesome community, Big Yoga, where I am inspired and empowered by like minded individuals. At times when we have group gatherings, where the yogis will play “hype” music to create a fun, free, and extroverted atmosphere! In those times, I find myself withdrawing because I don’t want to dance. Now, I totally know how to dance, but don’t want to because I am not comfortable with how I look, and the funny thing is nobody cares! Nonetheless, I am not comfortable with how I look because I have gained weight, and I tend to yo-yo with my weight (gaining/shedding) at times. Digging deeper into not expressing myself in dancing (which I used to LOVE), and coming to terms that it’s because of my weight gain, is a result of my emotional eating. So, I totally know better to make awesome and healthy food choices for my body, but at times, when I’m angry about something, frustrated, or even excited enough to celebrate, I use that opportunity to damage my body instead of empowering my body. I would hate to admit that I have an eating disorder, but to me the first step to correcting the issue, is to be very clear and admit exactly the the underlying issue. Digging even more deeper, I realized that as a child, I was always told to eat all of my food no matter what, not by my mother, but definitely from other people. It was a waste of money to not finish all of the food on your plate. So at times, I find myself gorging, or having the attitude of “I MUST” finsh everything on my plate, not realizing that I can always save it for later. This is something that is unfolding bit by bit for me, as I explore my eating habits and the fear associated with.

I do believe and agree that fear is a choice that I am make. Fear is an illusion, and a collection of past negative thoughts that we recreate in our minds that we project in the future, that ultimately keeps us stuck!

That damn, ego!!

In the the new thought community, we address fear as,

False

Evidence

Appearing

Real

It’s all mental! And the best thing about it being a mental thing, is that I have total control over it! If I can project positive thoughts and manifest a better reality, then I certainly can manifest a better body, and better choices when I eat! I also have to conscious enough to forgive myself when I do eat something unhealthy, instead of beating myself up, feeling shame or guilt. Ego, that little negative voice in your mind, keeps you stuck. And if you’re stuck, you can’t grow. And if you don’t grow, unfortunately, you stay the same. We (spiritual beings and light workers) are not meant to stay the same. We are meant to evolve! It’s time and I’m so forever grateful that I’m doing the self-work to get on the path of LOVING myself even more, and ever evolving in healthy way. I still have work to do, AND I’m taking steps toward healing!

Just like Gabby in this video, I invite you to be fearless and list what you’re afraid of laugh at! Put that fear on blast and squash the shit out of it!

As for me, the food journal is on deck!

What are your fears?

Comment below, and release that shit!! You and I are fearless and limitless, let’s get it!

May Cause Miracles – Day 5: I Forgive Myself For Choosing This Fear. Today I Choose LOVE Instead!

Today started out great, but ended with the biggest challenge! My boyfriend is getting on my nerves again! I think I’m growing and elevating spiritually and we’re just not on the same level. If it is our time to separate, I am ready.  This is a situation that will definitely unfold, and I”m sure I’ll gain greater clarity on what I need to do as I learn more about myself on this 40 day spiritual detox.

On a brighter note, today’s affirmation was “I Forgive Myself For Choosing This Fear. Today I Choose LOVE instead.” Immediately, I thought about how guilty I felt and still feel about having an abortion in the past. Convincing myself that the timing was just bad for reasons why I decided to abort, I’m cool with. It’s the extra guilt I feel while trying for another baby. I want to have one more baby and sometimes I feel really bad that I aborted in the past, that I haven’t really forgiven myself and moved on, which could be a blockage. This was very challenging for me all day, and this is something that I can’t just fix in one day.

I forgive myself for choosing this fear. I choose LOVE instead of fear.

While in my new yoga class today, spirit spoke to me LOUD & CLEAR!!! Lying in child’s pose, eyes closed, the instructor began to talk about the theme of the day…….FORGIVENESS! And not just FORGIVENESS, SELF-FORGIVENESS!!!  I hear you, LOUD AND CLEAR. I’m learning to trust my intuition more when it comes to myself (I tend to hear it more when I need to relay messages to others.).

 

S/N (Side Note): I originally wrote this on 8/1/13…..After practicing my affirmations, channeling my anger into outlets such as meditation, running, delving deeper into my spiritual studies, connecting with other like-minded individuals, and yoga, I’m at peace with the relationship that my boyfriend and I are in. We are learning to live with each other and adapt to each other’s ways. I am also seeing that the more that I take time to breathe, be still, and listen, before getting my defense ready for a long drawn out argument, it’s helping the vibration between us. I am seeing where he is coming from, even when I don’t agree, however I don’t attack him regarding his feelings and beliefs on certain things. In return, he does the same….it’s like he’s mirroring me, without realizing he’s doing so. I don’t have to say he needs to change, even if I feel he needs to. The change in me, creates the change in him.

May Cause Miracles – Day 4: Gratitude Is The Attitude!

I started day 4 on 7/26/13, however, I kinda got slightly blocked while writing down what I was grateful for and listing my top 5 fears! It set me back in a way that I had to repeat  day 1 through 3, just to get by the weekend. Why? Because the real test is when you’re actually in the situation that you’ve been preparing for.  For example, if you have anger issues and you claim that you’re gonna work on them and a dilemma suddenly pops up where it would be a great learning experience for you to do so, and then you don’t……you fail the life test. However, if you’re in that ugly situation and you’re choosing to see LOVE instead of fear, then you’ve passed life’s test. So anyway, that’s kinda the gist of what I was growing through, while reflecting on day 4.  There were people challenging me, and instead of reacting to them negatively, I had to go back to day 1 through 3, to gain inner strength to pass my particular life test.

Here we are on day 4! Reflecting, seeing gratitude in the difficult areas in my life. It’s easy being grateful for everything great, however it’s the not-so-great things that we need to be grateful for as well…..that’s where I got stuck. I went through some sort of rejection trying to write down my top 5 fears and actually writing down what I learned from them. May Cause Miracles is really challenging me to go deep within to get out all the crud!

I’ll share with you, one of my fears.

I hate where I live, I really do! I hate the neighborhood! I hate the people in the neighborhood! And I hate the mean children in the neighborhood! This is a feeling I’ve been going through for the past year, mainly because I’m not used to living in an area like this, long term, and it’s not ideal to raise black teenage boys. I’ve been looking for a house and found one that I’ve spiritually claimed! All that hate that I displayed about my current situation needs to be replaced and seen with the lens of LOVE. It’s all fear surrounding my reasoning for hating where I live.

Fear of what people may think when they come visit.

Fear of the actual people in the neighborhood.

Addressing my judgmental ways (being judgmental is a fear).

Fear that I may have to stay somewhere like this long term.

Instead of looking at my current situation from the illusion of fear, LOVE is activated and has now set in! I’ve been actively projecting a sense of LOVE for my surroundings to thrust me into the living area I/my family deserves. So, instead of all that hate I focused on, I started saying,

“I LOVE where I live, I really do!”

” I LOVE my neighborhood!”

“I LOVE the people in my neighborhood!”

“And I LOVE the nice children in my neighborhood!”

Day 4, enlightened and helped me focus on how my fears guide me to GROW rather than stay stuck!

I leave you with an awesome quote from May Cause Miracles – Day 4:

“Rather than looking at your fears as problems, be grateful for the LOVING assignment for spiritual growth. All problems offer us opportunities to strengthen our faith in LOVE. It may be difficult to see that opportunity in some problems, but be willing to see growth opportunities in all difficult situations.” — Gabrielle Bernstein